Avengers: Infinity War spoiler hootenanny

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I saw it. I actually liked it! I'm ambivalent at best about a lot of Marvel movies, and I was extremely bored by the first half of the last big cross-over movie they did, but this one kept me entertained. When the end came, I was surprised because I thought there was another forty minutes left; for a movie that's over two and a half hours long, that's impressive.

Below, find some spoiler-filled discussions of specific parts of the movie.

  • Despite Nerd Movie Twitter losing their minds about it, that ending is clearly not going to stick, because there's no way in hell they're killing off Chadwick Boseman as Black Panther after one movie. Superhero movies are starting to inherit some of the problems of their source material, and shallow fake-out deaths will soon be among them.
  • What the shit was up with Red Skull of all people showing up on another planet as some sort of cosmic wraith? Is this really clumsy setup for the next movie, or was it just a bit of fan-service?
  • Thanos essentially being the main character of the movie was neat, and he's interesting, but his scenes didn't have room to breathe. Reviewers clamouring about how this is actually THANOS: THE MOVIE are massively over-stating things. The twist with Gamora in particular feels like it could have done with more setup.
  • I'm not sure putting nu-Spiderman in this one was a good idea. The jokey-joke quip-factory version of the character doesn't really work in a big, epic, "serious" movie, and its weird that he's still doing it while fighting an invincible alien warlord on another planet.
  • Here's my prediction for how the next movie plays out: they create another universe somehow, which makes another set of infinity stones, and then they put them in the conspicuously-placed second gauntlet that Space Peter Dinklage has. The new universe contains familiar-but-different versions of all the heroes who evaporated at the end, who come over to replace the important ones. Iron Man and Captain America die, and their alternate-universe replacements look radically different for no real reason. If this is correct, let it be officially known that I predicted it first.