Let’s watch the Netflix Avatar trailer

I haven’t been feeling well enough to consume much content recently, hence the lack of blog posts. To make up for it, here’s a rambling post about a 90-second teaser trailer for a TV series I’m only mildly interested in, FEEL THE EXCITEMENT.

So Avatar: The Last Airbender is kind of a weird property. People roughly my age have a startling level of nostalgia for the series, to the point where it’s not uncommon to hear nerdy white guys in their thirties refer to it as one of the greatest television shows of all time. I would count myself as an Avatar fan, but not nearly to that extent; I watched it as it was originally airing, enjoyed it quite a bit and retain fond memories of it, but I never formed the kind of long-lasting fandom for the world or characters that a lot of other people seem to have, and I never revisited it once the last episode came out.

See, the thing with Avatar is that it was very much riding the anime wave that was washing over western pop culture in the mid-2000s, taking the serialized storytelling and somewhat more mature tone that kids were getting from their Dragonballs and their Gundams and injecting that into the family-friendly Saturday morning cartoon formula of Nickelodeon. And certainly, compared to what else was airing on Nickolodeon in 2005, Avatar seemed extremely sophisticated and ambitious. But compared to actual anime, even including a lot of actual anime that was also aimed primarily at children, it was…not really either of those things. By the time the series started airing I had already begun torrenting anime from the endless treasure trove of the internet, so I didn’t need to turn to a second-rate western imitator to get my fix. Maybe some of the intense love towards the show comes from people a few years younger than me for whom that wasn’t the case.

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One Piece Season One

If you’re at all familiar with the pop culture landscape, you’ll know that movie adaptations of video games don’t have a good reputation, neither with critics nor audiences. That now seems to be changing with the arrival of the Mario movie, which made mad bank and managed to be inoffensive junk food instead of rancid spoiled milk, and especially HBO’s The Last Of Us TV series, which I’ll be discussing here on the blog at some point.

But the tide is only beginning to turn. For the moment, “based on the hit video game” is still a huge red flag.

Now, what if I told you that “based on the hit anime/manga” is an even bigger one?

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Trash TV: The Watcher

The case of The Watcher is a fascinating unsolved mystery. The link I provided gives the full details, but the gist of it is that an American family purchased their “dream house” and then started receiving creepy and vaguely threatening letters from an unknown stalker. The family were ultimately scared into selling their home at a loss, and the identity of The Watcher was never uncovered.

It’s the kind of story that seems tailor-made for adaptation into a movie or TV series. Indeed, among those who believe that the Broaddus parents made the whole thing up, that’s one of the most popular proposed motives. So how could producer Ryan “American Horror Story” Murphy and a boatload of Netflix cash take such fertile material and turn it into…this?

Netflix’s The Watcher is either one of the most ineptly-made pieces of media I’ve ever seen, or a stealth parody whose cover is so deep that it’s looped back around to being unironically terrible. I honestly don’t think it matters which is true, because the show is a hilarious trainwreck either way.

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Trash TV: The Walking Dead Seasons 1-3

Note: Going to take January off blogging, enjoy 2023 y’all

So I’m not sure if you’ve heard, but The Walking Dead recently ended after airing for forty years continuously. I have a strange and mysterious inclination to get involved in pop cultural media right before they end, so I decided now would be the perfect time to travel all the way back to 1962 and check out the first three seasons of AMC’s putrid golden goose.

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Durgan vs Elfe: The Rings Of Power

Hot on the heels of Sad Dragon Family And Friends, here’s my review of the first episode of The Lord of The Power: The Rings of Ring.

In contrast to Game of Thrones, my level of fandom for Tolkien is pretty much non-existent: I saw the three LOTR movies once when they came out, liked them but didn’t love them, and have never read a single word of the man’s writing. I have zero familiarity with the material this series is drawing on, nor do I care at all about how faithful it is to said material.

So as a non-fan just looking for a high budget shiny fantasy series to watch, how was the opening episode?

The Rings Of Power takes place in Middle-Earth’s second age, a time that came before the third age but after the first age. I assume that means something else to Tolkienheads, but for normal people all you need to know is that this is long before the events of The Hobbit and The Lord Of the Rings. It’s prequel time, baby! Those always turn out well and are universally embraced by fans.

Anyway, the elves have finished up a long war against Morgoth, the first Dark Lord who attacked their homeland centuries ago, and everyone is convinced that the threat is gone and an era of peace is at hand. Everyone, that is, except for returning protagonist Galadriel, who is convinced that Morgoth’s lieutenant Sauron is still out there and getting ready to finish what Morgoth started. She is, of course, correct about this, and when the threat becomes apparent to the wider world the different races of Middle Earth have to start putting their differences aside to face it. Presumably this eventually involves forging the titular rings of power that cause so much trouble in the Third Age.

As I’ve said before when it comes to fantasy on the teevee, the opening episode needs to do a lot of work very quickly in terms of introducing the setting and characters. Arguably Rings Of Power is in a worse position in this regard than House Of The Dragon, as the latter is sufficiently similar to its original installment that the show only needs to get viewers caught up on the small number of changes, whereas Rings Of Power is like a thousand years before the books and movies and pretty much everything is different apart from the major races of Middle Earth. How does the show balance conveying all of this information while getting the actual plot moving?

Well, it…doesn’t.

Despite looking absurdly gorgeous, the first episode really left me cold due to its heavy-handed, expository writing. Characters come on screen and bluntly explain who they are and what their deal is, or engage in clumsy as-you-know conversations with other people. All the poetic faux-Tolkien dialogue in the world can’t disguise how hacky this is. I constantly felt that the storylines spinning up seemed like they should theoretically be very engaging, but the clunky writing kept me on the outside.

The episode’s editing is also rough, with a lot of scenes ending slightly too quickly so that the pacing feels off. Elsewhere, the episode continues with one character’s story when it seems like it should, for the sake of pacing, be cutting to someone else, and vice versa.

This was all off-putting enough that I didn’t end up watching the second episode, despite intending to. I’m going to go back and give it another shot at some point—the end of this first episode, when the actual plot kicked in, was already getting more interesting—but for the moment, House Of The Dragon wins this round.






Durgan vs Elfe: The House Of The Dragon

My migraines are kicking up again and as such I haven’t been reading a whole lot, but by a happy coincidence two major fantasy TV shows–Game Of Thrones prequel House Of The Dragon and Lord Of The Rings prequel(?) The Rings Of Power–are starting almost back to back. In lieu of having anything else to talk about, here’s my review of the first two episodes of the former; a Rings Of Power post will follow after its streaming premiere on the 2nd of September.

I guess I am, technically, a Game Of Thrones fan, in the sense that I watched every episode of it and enjoyed it more than I didn’t. However, my feelings on the series are a lot more muted than the real hardcore fans—I didn’t like the earlier seasons as much as other people, I didn’t hate the last two as much as other people (or, really, at all; I was actually fine with all of the things that happened at the end, it was just the rushed pacing that tripped it up).

So while I’m interested enough to watch the episodes as they come out, I’m not exactly going into this vibrating with excitement. I didn’t watch any of the trailers and didn’t know what it was going to be about beyond the absolute basics, which is also how I experienced Game Of Thrones. How do these first two episodes compare?

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The Purge Season 1

The Purge is an IP that seems to be in a perpetual state of wasted potential. The first movie infamously squandered its fascinating premise on a rote home invasion plot, but even the sequels always felt like they were failing to really make good on the promise of the franchise’s central idea.

Enter the Amazon Prime series of the same name. With nine to ten episodes a season, can this extended Purge finally succeed where the movies didn’t?

The premise, for those not familiar: it’s some vague number of years after an authoritarian group called the New Founding Fathers have taken control of America, and one of their big innovations is the Purge, an annual “holiday” where for one night all crime is legal. This is supposedly aimed at reducing crime by letting people get all of their crime urges out in a semi-controlled manner, but its actual purpose is to reduce the population of homeless, poor, minorities and other people the NFFA considers a drain on society.

So just like in the movies, it’s Purge night and a diverse cast of characters find themselves, for one reason or another, out on the streets and in danger. This time around we’ve got a teenage girl looking to sacrifice herself at the behest of the Purge cult she’s joined, her estranged Marine brother who would rather that didn’t happen, a finance executive who hires an assassin to kill someone and then gets cold feet, and an upwardly mobile young couple who attend an NFFA party in hopes of securing funding for their business ventures.

Right away we’ve got a more interesting selection of protagonists here than “person whose car breaks down ten miniutes before the Purge siren goes off.” A big reason for this is that the expanded scope of a series lets the show take its time getting the characters out of the safety of their secure enclaves rather than rushing to the action as soon as possible. In fact, one of the multiple plotlines takes place almost entirely behind fortified doors, the show making the point that holing up somewhere isn’t necessarily any safer than being out on the streets if you can’t trust the people you’re holed up with.

Having four different viewpoint characters whose storylines don’t intersect until the end of the season (in quite an elegant twist, I might add) lets the show take a more expansive look at what kinds of trouble a hapless citizen can get into on Purge night beyond just being chased by machete-wielding killers in masks. One of the constant criticisms of the movie franchise is that it focused on murder to the exclusion of all other kinds of crimes, and the series remedies this to an extent. 

Yes, we still mostly have people in zany costumes killing each other for funsies, but there’s other illegal activity highlighted like human trafficking, contract killing and—in probably the darkest and most disturbing scene the franchise has ever featured—sexual harassment. The show uses an admirable level of restraint when it comes to that last topic rather than going as over the top as it does with the violence, which if anything just makes the sequence more horrific than it might have been otherwise.

In a show with four main characters who mostly operate on completely separate story arcs, some are inevitably less interesting than others. My personal choice for the most disappointing protagonist is Jane Barber, the finance exec who sets out to stop the assassination she put into motion. For most of the series she was actually my favourite character, but in the last episode she delivers a speech about how the Purge is bad actually–a conclusion she had already reached by episode three–tries and fails to stop the bad guy, and then gets unceremoniously killed. I kind of get the feeling the writers ran out of things to do with her before the end.

In the past I’ve advanced the idea that the Purge movies are aimed primarily at angry American liberals. Given that this is a franchise featuring—in an entry released in 2016–supporters of a far-right US regime rioting after their candidate loses an election, maybe that’s fair enough. I still wish they were a bit more subtle about it. Like, I know rich dipshits in real life don’t pay taxes, but having the rich dipshit just blithely announce that he doesn’t pay taxes is a bit on the nose.

Despite these issues, this first season is for my money easily the best Purge-related piece of media that’s been released. Unfortunately the franchise seems to have reached its apotheosis just as its appeal started to wane, as the series was canceled after the second season. So, let’s see if the inevitable reboot in ten or so years can keep the momentum going.

Severance Season 1

In November of 2019, The iPhone Company launched Steve Jobs Presents Apple TV Plus, The Apple TV Channel, a new addition to the fifty media streaming companies attempting to recreate the broadcast television landscape of the late 90s except worse because now you pay for every channel individually. The service didn’t get off to a stellar start, with its first wave of original shows getting a decidedly lukewarm reaction.

But lately that’s been changing; the streamer (apparently that’s what we’re calling them now) recently became the first streaming service to win an Oscar with Coda, and its more recent original productions have been better received by critics. Chief among those is Severance, a show that with the recent conclusion of its first season seems to have become this generation’s Twin Peaks in terms of pop culture engagement and status. Does it deserve the hype? Get your waffles and corporate-branded finger traps ready as we find out.

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The Wheel Of Time Season One

I don’t mention this often here, On The Blog, but I resent Robert Jordan’s Wheel Of Time series of fantasy bricks on a subatomic level. I resent it for its overstuffed storytelling and non-existant pacing, for its constant horniness and weird gender politics. But mostly I resent it for the irreplaceable hours it’s stolen from my life. When I think back on my attempt to read the series in my late teens, I feel oblivion rushing towards me like the event horizon of a black hole, approaching ever closer with every passing second.

…But that’s largely only true of the series from the second book onwards! The first installment, The Eye Of The World, is a perfectly entertaining Tolkien knock-off. So I was curious to see how Jeff Bezos and his bank vault were going to adapt it for their streaming service Amazon TV: The Internet TV Station. A while ago I heartily roasted the first trailer, and so I went into this viewing experience with the firm expectation that the whole thing was going to be an embarrassing failure.

So imagine my surprise to learn that it’s…actually…pretty good? Even a lot of the things I hated about the trailer aren’t nearly as big an issue in the series itself! It turns out that judging eight hours of TV on a ninety-second marketing video isn’t always going to yield accurate results, who could possibly have guessed?

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Internet Horror: Marble Hornets

In the small but crowded realm of Youtube horror projects, nothing compares to Marble Hornets.

A brief history lesson: once upon a time there was a thread on the Something Awful forums that gave rise to internet creepypasta sensation Slenderman (maybe you’ve heard of him). For a while old slendie positively gripped the internet, and then the whole thing got played out and two girls stabbed their friend as part of a Slenderman-inspired delusion, signalling the final death knell of the phenomenon.

Of the many Slenderman creative projects that popped up during his reign of terror, Marble Hornets is probably the most famous. It set the standard and the tone for the initial wave of Slenderman creations, codified several long-standing tropes and ideas regarding how the character operates and interacts with his victims, and arguably did more to propel the whole thing into the mainstream than Slenderman’s actual creator.

Marble Hornets was created by a trio of young friends, whose creative endeavours fell apart in 2016 amidst hilarious drama. But before that they put out three seasons of the show on Youtube, bringing the story to a definitive conclusion--something of a rarity among Slenderman projects, which overwhelmingly tended to fizzle out as its college-aged creators graduated and got too busy to maintain them.

But how good is it, really? And does it still hold up in a post-Slenderman world? Let’s find out.

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Trash TV: Hospital Edition

Recently, while hospitalized for ten days, I decided to check out some thematically-appropriate medical dramas. This is a stratum of TV junk food that I don’t have a lot of familiarity with. While I have been known to watch a police procedural, hospital shows are outside my usual interest zone.

As we all know, the best way to tackle unfamiliar genres is to pick two completely random examples from the various streaming platforms. In that vein, here are reviews of the first episode of Night Shift and the first season of The Resident (guess which one I liked more).

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Trash TV: Wandavision

Well folks, it finally happened.

After more than a decade, I’ve been forced to discard my snooty disdain for the Marvel Cinematic Universe. I managed to maintain my sense of pop-cultural superiority despite quite liking Black Panther, Thor: Ragnarok and Captain Marvel, and really liking Avengers: Infinity War a whole lot. My disappointment with Endgame allowed me to resist the temptation of going full MCU Stan even as the movies diversified in form and scope and generally became more varied and interesting.

But now, they’ve done it. They got me with Wandavision. And all it took was almost completely leaving the superhero stuff behind and transitioning into another genre entirely.

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